If you’d asked me 15 months ago what I’d be doing today, I would have boasted that I would be celebrating my grandfather’s 100th birthday. Even then, the plans were already in the works. But suddenly, he was sick and a week later, just 6 weeks shy of his 99th birthday, he was gone.

I know as you read this, the words suddenly in relationship to a 98 year old man dying seem strange. But then you’d have to know my Granddad Shine to know that he was full of life, wisdom, vitality, hope and expectancy. So much so that some small part of me was convinced that he had found the fountain of youth and would be around forever.

So today, instead of celebrating with my grandfather, mother, siblings, aunts, uncles and 200 plus cousins (includes first, second and third), I sit here alone, contemplating life. Life is an uncontrollable force that we spend our days attempting to tame with our PDAs, calendars and flowcharts. We check bus, train and plane schedules as if we can measure our lives by departure and arrival times. Often, we make it according to the plan. But then there are times, when things appear to be going right on schedule and then life happens.

Sometimes life happens in a good way, an unexpected invitation to a baseball game where you meet your future husband or a surprise call from an old friend about a job that would be perfect for you. But then there are times when we’re heading to the baseball game with tickets we’ve paid for and the car just won’t start. Sometimes we don’t get that perfect job.

For me, one day in February 2007, one of my best friends called me to her office and handed me the phone. On the other end of the line, the most reassuring voice in the world came over the line (yep, that would be my Mama) and told me that my Granddad was gone. So, I knew then that today there would be no party.

But today, despite my pain and the longing for my family, I celebrate. I celebrate the legacy I’ve been given. I celebrate the fact that after not writing for almost two years, I am actually blogging. I celebrate the fact that tomorrow I will participate in my first walk for charity. Even as I celebrate, I am laughing deep inside because I know I’m not ready for this walk. But like everything else, I’ll survive and when it is all said and done, I’ll be a better person for it.

I am comforted by the knowledge that even though I my plans changed, God is not surprised by the turn of events. Despite my boasting and planning, He always knew that I’d be celebrating my grandfather’s 100th birthday alone with my laptop and reruns of Bonanza. Yep, life just keeps happening…but even then, God happens all the same!