Total inappropriateness, whether spoken or done, makes me want to crawl under a table. I just don’t handle train-wrecks very well. Unfortunately too many people do. The shocking truth is that as time passes the idea of basic etiquette floats farther and farther out the window–this goes for everything from table manners to addressing elders respectfully. Sadly, too many of us either don’t get it or never learned it.
So here’s lesson number one, fashion etiquette. I’m not talking about the right outfit for the right setting, that’s a whole other beast that I’ll address another time. I’m talking about way too common questions that should never be uttered to a fashionista:
Where did you get that? Okay so I admit, this is a tough one. The odds of these words spilling off your tongue are high, it’s almost like a natural reflex–but use all restraint necessary and don’t ask. Most of the time people will volunteer the info without you having to, if they don’t, then they probably don’t want to share. First off, if you love it just looking at it, imagine how much that person loved it when they first saw it and decided to buy it. Give them the satisfaction of having it to enjoy for themselves, no one wants to see a copycat with the same pair of shoes. Secondly, are you really going to go out and buy the exact item that you saw on someone else? Probably not, so just pay the compliment and keep it moving.
How much was it? Ladies seriously, this is like asking a woman her age. Plain and simple it’s rude and it’s her business.
Is that real? Oh gosh, I cringe just thinking about it. Unless she’s your “sista from another motha” and ya’ll just have an understanding about these types of questions, never ever ask. Plus, chances are if you have to ask, it probably is.
Can I try it on? There is just an awkwardness about watching someone else slide their foot into your shoe or slide on your favorite ring. Admiration from a distance is the safest bet for all parties involved.
What are your fashion etiquette do’s and don’t?
August 13th, 2008 at 5:12 pm
I’d have to agree with all of your points! Another question you never want asked is “What size is that”? I get that all the time and quite honestly thats worse than an age/weight/income question.
I also hate it when you’re walking and someone says to someone else (referring to you) “Her _____ is nice”. Why can’t ppl just give you the compliment directly?!
Just my .02.
August 13th, 2008 at 6:31 pm
Oooo, yeah that size question is a definite no no! Who would dare ask that?!
August 14th, 2008 at 7:45 am
I agree with you on all points…but #1 is a grey area. If I am friends with the person, I may ask….and I may buy the object of my admiration. I may get a different color, or I may not. I could also see something that I liked better. Discretion is the key when asking question #1…also knowing the person that you are asking. If you know that the person prides themselves in being the “only person” to own this or that (although it’s NOT couture, and they bought it in H&M), then definitely admire the item and keep it moving. I personally don’t care. What I wear is going to look different on someone else anyway. As for the other questions…how rude! I thought people stopped trying on each other’s clothes in 7th grade. Yuck!
August 14th, 2008 at 4:58 pm
i can’t believe people actually asks these questions (the first one excluded. i’m guilty of that too…but mostly just with purses)! But ‘is that real?’ I would never, even if I was wondering.
August 15th, 2008 at 9:30 am
OMG YESSSSSSS, this is crazy…I hate when people ask all of those questions…its like how dare you??????? I was on the train a couple of days ago adn this girl asked me where did I get my shirt from…already not wanting to tell her I just said “I got it in this store in Brooklyn, last summer” (by the way which is the truth) and thinking she would leave it at that because the shirt is no longer available she then asked “what store?” and I was like “WHAT????” I hate when people ask me those questions, I dont want anyone else wearing the cute things I found….YOU GOTTA FIND THEM YOURSELF!!!!! LOL
August 17th, 2008 at 7:37 pm
HA HA!! Mes I can’t believe the girl asked you “what store?” that is taking it too far, but definitely proves that she planned on going to look for it.
Well at least we can all start here with putting these etiquette rules into practice.