This week I get real with a married woman jealous of her boyfriend’s fiancé.
Dear Tia,
I am married and I have an affair going on with my old school flame. Things worked out well between us. But now he is getting married and he keeps telling me that he’s doing it for his parents and the girl isn’t the kind he wants. I’m jealous and can’t handle my feelings. Should I still remain in touch with him post marriage or move on? – Still in Love
Dear Still in Love,
I’m confused about how things have worked out well between you and your sidepiece – you’re married and he’s engaged. That aside, it’s time for you to leave the man alone. You seem very concerned about whether or not he wants to get married, but that’s not really an issue. He’s a grown man and can make his own choices and the same goes for you. By deciding to enter into a relationship with someone you can’t fully commit to you’ve relinquished your right to be jealous. You have a husband – but you don’t have to be there. If you don’t want to be with your spouse you can leave. Your old flame’s soon-to-be wife should be respected. If you really want to be with this man split up with your husband and make a play for the one who has your heart. If not, you can’t have your husband and hers, so leave him – and his family – alone.
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December 11th, 2009 at 1:26 am
Seriously, “still in love” is delusional as to what her true role in her lover’s life and what love truly entails. If she had respect for herself & husband, perhaps her lover would have some for her as well. And maybe he would think more of her than just the booty call that she presents herself as. As he’s decided to marry someone other than her, clearly he does think enough of her to be marriage material. No doubt it has something to do with the fact she’s cheating on a current husband.